Sometimes it’s hard to see through a bad day.
This time last year, I tried to get a blog off the ground that would do what spark notes does: explain things you should probably know as a “cultured” human being in an understandable way. Except Sporknotes, my poor little brainchild, would be so much more! I had plans to sum up current events, movies, mythologies, […]
The Little Version I discovered the phenomenon that is Grey Gardens today, over thirty years too late, and this is how I feel: If you don’t know about Grey Gardens, I have provided a nifty explanation of my findings down below in “The Big Version” of my discovery. In short, this is what I learned […]
If I’m going to wear a dress that suffocates, it might as well weigh 100 pounds and put the peasants in an uproar. Just sayin’.
Do you use whitening toothpaste? Your skin looks flawless. I thought you must run or lift weights or something. Your arms look skinny. I wish I could pull off those pants. [This can mean two things.] He will never get over you. How did you manage to straighten your hair when you have to wake […]
Do you hear that? That strange, distant clicking? It is the sound of the entire world … pre-ordering the new iPhone. As a proud owner of a dumb phone (the kind that can’t even participate in group texts, poor thing), it would take a major innovation to convince me to make the change over to […]
Today I picked up USC’s campus newspaper, The Daily Trojan, for the first time, hoping to learn more about social events that aren’t football. Instead, I found this, the first entry in the crime blotter: CRIMES AGAINST A PERSON At 2:29 P.M. on Sept. 4, a staff member in the Eileen and Kenneth T. Norris […]
Sometimes when I am walking home from my classes at 10 o’clock at night wondering if I’ll get mugged, or walking into a meeting smelling distinctly of goat after making the sweaty trek from my house to campus, I think (and never ever say out loud because that would be talking to myself and I […]